Our first softball game is upon us!

We have our first softball game today. I usually put together the line-ups, and I try and start off each season with a clever message to the team that illustrates the fun nature of team.

My Season-Opener Message
Joe Buck [Voice-over]: Springtime on the National Mall. Cherry blossoms. Long shadows from late evening sunsets. And between the paved streets, the politicians in their Armani suits, in and among the tourists wearing “FBI Witness Protection” t-shirts and snapping digital photos of the monuments and museums, a gathering takes place, a new beginning: softball is back for another season.

[Cue the Fox Sports theme…]

Joe Buck: Hello everybody, this is Joe Buck, my partner in crime Tim McCarver will be joining me in just a moment. So here we are at the beginning of another softball season and you can feel the excitement in the air. The Slams are taking on the Rangers and we’ve got a lot to talk about, but first, starting line up.

[Cue the Fox Sports fancy lineup graphic]

  1. Colby (3B)
  2. Tony (LF)
  3. Jamie (SS)
  4. Lou (1B)
  5. Tom (CF)
  6. Ben (2B)
  7. Kristy (P)
  8. Ben G. (SF)
  9. Douglas (C)
  10. Emily (RF)
  11. Mark (DH)

Joe Buck: So, Tim, what you think about the Slam’s possibilities this season.

Tim McCarver: Joe, I can describe it in one word: “offense”. Lou is coming off a career season where his on-base percentage was an astonishing .800 and his on-base plus slugging was an incredible 1.93. They’ve moved Lou to the cleanup spot this year, and there’s a reason for that. Look for him to be driving in a lot of runs.

Joe Buck: And they’ve got Colby in the leadoff spot, Tim. What was the thinking there?

Tim McCarver: Fans of the Slams will recall that Colby was a midseason acquisition last year and proved to be excellent at third base. She was able to fill in as a utility player, sharing the load at third with Jeremy. She’s got speed, and when she hits the ball, it’s usually to the left side. As you know, Joe, in softball, speed down the baseline counts and pulling the ball to the left side as she does means that the Slams can expect a lot of lead off base-hits from Colby.

Joe Buck: The Slams ace pitcher, Kristy, has returned for another season and is getting the season opening start, and she’ll be pitching to a new face for the Slams, Douglas.

Tim McCarver: Well, Joe, you bring up a good point. There are a lot of new faces on the Slam’s ball club this season. They’ve got Tony in left field. Not only can he cover some territory out there, but I’ve seen him at batting practice and this guy can hit. I was talking to him in the club house earlier today and he seemed calm but eager to get out there and make his mark. You’ve got Ben at second base. He told me earlier that he used to play third base and but he didn’t anticipate the same kinds of problems transitioning from third to second that A-Rod saw going from short to third.

Joe Buck: Ben G., Mark, Emily–all new faces for the Slams this season.

Tim McCarver: And you know, Joe, what you don’t see in the line up is almost as interesting as what you do see. The Slams have power on the bench this season, and they are planning to use it. I spoke with Slams co-captain Jamie this morning and he told me that he’s got veterans Jeremy, Daniel, and Paul on the bench and that they’ll be rotating into the game today.

Joe Buck: It’s nice to have that kind of offensive power that you can bring into the game in the middle and later innings.

Tim McCarver: Look for the Slams to be hitting early and often, Joe.

Joe Buck: Thank you, Tim. Well there you have it folks, a rundown of tonight’s highly anticipated season opener between the Slams and the Rangers, here on the National Mall. First pitch is at 6:30 PM. Softball is back, and we’ll be back after this…

People loved it! I can’t wait to play. Game time is a little over 6 hours away and I’m already itching with anticipation.


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